Conversations

Post-coital conversation with significant other:
“So, you went out last night? Who did you go with, Joe?”
“No, I went by myself.”
“And you got stuck?”
“I was drunk and met a nice person who drove me home.”
“A man?”
“Yes”
“Did you take care of him?”
“NO!” (laughter)
“Did he take care of you?”
“NO! he just brought me home!”
“ I don’t like to play second fiddle to anyone.”
“Neither do I.” (sternly and calculated)

Post-coital conversation with man who brought me home last night:
“So, do you do phone numbers?”
“Are you asking me for my phone number?”
“Well are you the kinda girl that does that?”
“What, give out my phone number? (thinking) “No, you don’t really need my phone number for anything” (laughter)
“Do you have Facebook”
“Yes, I have Facebook. I am seeing someone, he lives right down the hall in fact, if you look out my peep hole, you will see his door. I was angry with him tonight, that’s why I went out.”
“Is he going to greet me with a baseball bat when I leave?”
“No.”
“Do you do this often?”
“Yes. The last one was a much better kisser than you, but you have a nicer cock.”
“I admire your honesty”
“You’re free to go anytime, be careful in the hall.”

I didn’t thank him for the ride home……that was mean.